Every so often I really am tempted to have someone just take care of the yard for me. (That does not mean that everyone reading this with a landscape business should call me.) Because, if someone else took care of it, I would miss out on all the important stuff I am supposed to learn through the experience of getting out there. For those who have received my newsletter in the past, you have read about butterflies, weeds, micro-climates and a host of other yard related topics. Well this week it’s about potato vine or kudzu. Let me explain what I mean.

Looks beautiful!

A number of years ago we built a new house on a wooded lot, a heavily wooded, previously un-cleared or ever mowed au-natural lot. This gave us a head start on that Florida landscape, that Sunken Gardens’ look that I love. It also gave us some interesting plants…like potato vine. If you are unsure what this is, think of driving on I-75 and those beautiful vines that fill the wooded sides of the road. That is what the back third of our lot looked like, with some beautiful native plants that we wanted to keep and some palmettos and palms…so we cleared this by hand.

This week working in my backyard, I realized that it is just like some of the other areas of my life. I may have been eating well, exercising, and taking my supplements or maybe I have been pursuing personal development by reading or maybe I have made a commitment to manage my finances more diligently and have been more careful in my spending. However, maintaining these habits is more than 21 days to a different life. 21 days is a start, but real lifelong development of behavior means periodically checking in to make sure that there are no little pieces of that old weedy behavior trying to rear its ugly head.

Looks can be deceiving...

I am still clearing by hand! Now it isn’t what it was. But I still have to be diligent, I still have to get out there and rescue the palmettos from this lovely, encroaching, invasive vine that would take over the world if there were not people like me. Although this vine has less of a hold on my yard year after year, like my life and the things that are important to me…auto pilot is not an option. Have you checked in lately to see how your garden is doing?

Popularity: 1% [?]

In the last couple weeks we have had a “few cold” days in Florida. In some ways it was kind of nice to have a fire in the fireplace, and to be able to wear my leather jacket and the couple of warm sweaters that I own. However, despite the fact the people still looked fairly normal…strangely garbed shapes began to appear…some in florals and others in stripes and solids.

“Chickens”…”wimps” our northern friends think! Yet apprehension mounts as reports of near freezing temperatures circulate and our vegetation takes the covers…literally.

Several years ago I made a major change professionally. It wasn’t that I didn’t enjoy what I did, simply that there was something I wanted to do more. So I moved from my comfortable spot inside with more than adequate lighting and regular watering into the big outdoors. As I began to put out new roots without the confines of my former planter…it was scary. Used to a regular watering schedule and climate controlled comfort, a few of my leaves yellowed and dropped off.

Interesting that what fits in a lovely little pot on a windowsill in New York (like a pencil cactus) may grow 10 feet tall in my yard! In contrast to that, some gorgeous foliage (like hostas) won’t survive outside down here, regardless of the coaxing.

After about two years, I love where I am at in my life. I help people make changes. I help them see that there are more choices than they thought. I watch people and businesses grow and thrive and am thankful to be a part of their process. I look at my life and see the changes that I have made and can’t imagine going back. Am I done growing? Not even close in this climate.

**This post appeared several years ago in my Joy Beyond Freedom newsletter and I believe is even more relevant today! STAY TUNED for more “Climate and Growth News.”

Popularity: 1% [?]

In the last couple weeks we have had a “few cold” days in Florida. In some ways it was kind of nice to have a fire in the fireplace, and to be able to wear my leather jacket and the couple of warm sweaters that I own. However, despite the fact the people still looked fairly normal…strangely garbed shapes began to appear…some in florals and others in stripes and solids.

“Chickens”…”wimps” our northern friends think! Yet apprehension mounts as reports of near freezing temperatures circulate and our vegetation takes the covers…literally.

Several years ago I made a major change professionally. It wasn’t that I didn’t enjoy what I did, simply that there was something I wanted to do more. So I moved from my comfortable spot inside with more than adequate lighting and regular watering into the big outdoors. As I began to put out new roots without the confines of my former planter…it was scary. Used to a regular watering schedule and climate controlled comfort, a few of my leaves yellowed and dropped off.

Interesting that what fits in a lovely little pot on a windowsill in New York (like a pencil cactus) may grow 10 feet tall in my yard! In contrast to that, some gorgeous foliage (like hostas) won’t survive outside down here, regardless of the coaxing.

After about two years, I love where I am at in my life. I help people make changes. I help them see that there are more choices than they thought. I watch people and businesses grow and thrive and am thankful to be a part of their process. I look at my life and see the changes that I have made and can’t imagine going back. Am I done growing? Not even close in this climate.

**This post appeared several years ago in my Joy Beyond Freedom newsletter and I believe is even more relevant today! STAY TUNED for more “Climate and Growth News.”

Popularity: 1% [?]

It wasn’t until sometime during the 1300’s that some artists began representing the world 3 dimensionally in their work. Prior artworks were 2 dimensional or “flat.” Mathematical concepts inspired the “vanishing point”, a technique that created perspective. It took artists thousands of years to do what children today begin learning in elementary school art class.

Around this same time period, spurred on by the adventures of Marco Polo, men began to consider that the world might be other than they had imagined.  Christopher Columbus, through his exploration of the New World proved that our world was, in fact, not flat either. Life would never be the same as man’s consciousness embraced new dimensions.

Several hundred years later, man again would move into the unknown and impossible. This time, concepts initiated by science fiction writers such as Jules Verne with their voyages to the bottom of the sea, outer space and time travel would be incorporated into investigative procedures. These would allow man to not only travel to great depths and heights, but to actually work for extended time periods in environments that would further a multitude of industries.

It is said, “What the mind can conceive and believe… man can achieve.”

Yet do you ever feel like your life is flat? Perspective can be defined as a view of things or facts in which they are in right relation. When you look around, do you ever feel that your life may be slightly out of focus? Do you ever wonder if there could be more beyond your current experience? Are there things that you have only dreamt of, but have not really considered possible?

Changing your perspective is changing the way you view things. New dimensions that can only be imagined are simply over the horizon if you can only get past the gatekeepers of “shouldn’t” and “couldn’t”. Begin to add richness and increased depth to your life by identifying priorities, and incorporating goals and an action plan.

Then with accountability relationships, regularly reexamine those projections and make adjustments as necessary to keep your course to a new world.

Popularity: 75% [?]

So you purposed in your heart it is time to change.

It is time to do something. And you are going to do whatever it takes, or so you thought! Now you are wondering…do I really want this that bad? Is it really worth it?

All my friends know about this caterpillar thing. How I killed the prospective butterflies and kept the weeds…so much for transparency. Then, having learned my lesson, I publicly proclaimed that I would no longer care more about the appearance of my front flower bed and would allow the caterpillars to eat to their hearts content knowing all along that the leaves on my bushes would grow back…they did last time…and that I would be the butterfly benefactor.

However, because I killed those nasty pests last time…I did not fully appreciate how bad the front garden would look. They have been eating my bushes for about 6 weeks and they’re huge! Last week I was having a party…a friend suggested I put a sign up front, “Feeding in Progress.” It has been a tremendous joke.

So I am struggling. I mean when are they going to do this cocoon thing anyway? Do I really want to go the distance? Herein lies the power of Weight Watchers, AA and all groups that provide true accountability…it doesn’t matter whether I feel like it or not today…I will persevere. I have shared this story with all sorts of audiences…hundreds of people. It doesn’t matter how messy and unattractive this growth process is…the caterpillars stay…at least until they become butterflies.

<— Weeds #1: Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder
<— Weeds #2: The Bugs are Back!

Popularity: 61% [?]

I discovered these black and yellow bugs all over my bushes out front. The bugs are back and I’m excited! Not that kind of “I just saw a mouse or such” freaked out excitement, but overjoyed at their presence.

I had shared with you my secret…how I had desired my own version of Sunken Gardens.

I was fostering this lush, somewhat native landscape that would attract a multitude of wildlife, including birds and butterflies. I planted a harmonious blend of foliage, and relished my emerging paradise…only to discover that insects had devoured the plants in my front planter down to the ugly stems. Very unhappy with the quite unattractive view I now had to share with all my neighbors, I had pride-fully gone to Wal-Mart to pick up an extremely toxic beverage, and had celebrated as each of those bugs had fallen dead to the ground.

Who knew what I was thinking. Except that several weeks later at a butterfly event at Sunken Gardens, it hit me…black and yellow caterpillars make great butterflies. My garden has prospered over the last couple years, and we get some great and somewhat rarer butterflies…but it wasn’t until just recently that the caterpillars returned. There are not near as many as there were the first time.

However….I am careful not to disturb them, even when I am watering. Hopefully, they will enjoy eating the bushes out front. I am just excited that sometimes in life, you get more than one chance to appreciate the beauty of transformation.

Popularity: 55% [?]

I have always had a thing for plants. There is something therapeutic about the process of working and growing things. A number of years ago I realized that not only do flowers bloom according to seasons, but so do weeds. Right now we have the long and slender stemmed yellow flowered weed. The leaves are somewhat fuzzy like a Gerber daisy and they pull out of the ground fairly easily when you get tired of the disruption to your golf course green. Next comes a similar purple flower with a tall slender stalk.

The leaves are quite different, much narrower, and prolific and stand up higher; but again these pull out fairly easily and make great bouquets for small children wanting to please their mother.

”So what,” you are wondering. I just reach over and pull the weeds out, it isn’t a big deal. However, all weeds are not created equal! After these come another much closer to the ground. They look like small roses, tolerate extreme heat and little rain, thriving even when all the grass has given up. Just try just pulling these out…good luck. Just as there are seasons in the plant world, so there are seasons in my life. As much as I work towards life balance, there are periods of time when there will be an abundance of opportunities.

When we moved into our new house several years ago we chose to clear the back portion of our property ourselves wanting to create a lush Florida friendly yard…our version of Sunken Gardens.

The first year I had mixed results. We had these beautiful lavender flowers on a stalk that somewhat resembled a sunflower. Going for the natural look, I left them excited about the beauty that was already available on my developing sanctuary. However when the black and yellow caterpillars began to strip my “snow on the mountain” down to bare stems, I have to say I wasn’t near as tolerant, spraying them with incredibly toxic substances and celebrating as they dropped off.

The funny thing is that the lavender flowers turned into these horrible stickers. (Have you ever just wanted to throw the clothes away rather than face the tedious chore of trying to get those things off?) And the bugs that I eliminated were the larvae for the butterflies I had wanted to attract. I had gotten so caught up in the ugliness of stripped plants; I had eliminated my opportunities to see the beauty that could have come.

The funny thing about weeds is that what one person might consider a weed, another person might plant. And where some gardeners hate and spray for insects others plant to attract them.   Yet what defines something as prized or rejected is not necessarily the thing itself, but the viewer.

Weeds #2: The Bugs Are Back! —>

Popularity: 47% [?]

When I work with my clients, I have the opportunity to bring clarity and focus into their lives. However, what is frequently apparent is that no matter how great I do that with others…it is extremely difficult to do for myself. There is an old saying “You can’t see the forest for the trees”.

Well, I am incredibly fortunate to have phenomenal coaches, counselors and accountability people in my life…however there was this one thing that had been nagging at me for a couple months. I had all this material; I was wading through it, but just couldn’t seem to find a common thread…voila…an hour with a friend earlier this week made it all seem so simple and so obviously apparent.

If you don’t have someone in your life who can give you objective feedback from a point of some expertise…find someone who does it well, whatever it is. Spend time with them; give them permission to give you feedback and to hold you accountable to follow through on your discussion.

Life changes when I do!

Joy Beyond Freedom is a Journey!

Popularity: 23% [?]

Somewhere there is a part of us that knows this. Most of us have heard at some time or another, “No change equals No change.” Sometimes we don’t know what to do to change.

Other times we know exactly what to do, but for some reason are immobilized to make that change. Maybe we are overwhelmed by the sheer amount of changes we might need to make to successfully navigate whatever challenge we might be facing. Maybe we just don’t have the strength to make that giant leap. Maybe it really is “their” fault. Maybe the marketplace has changed.

As hard as I have tried to change others during the course of my lifetime, I have finally resigned myself to the fact that I CAN NOT make anyone else change. Admittedly it would be a whole lot easier if everyone else would just step into line. However, since that isn’t about to happen much of the change in my world has had to start with me. I have had to change the way I think of things. This last summer I spent some time contemplating the transformation of caterpillars.

To a caterpillar even pebbles look big. Yet some huge butterflies soar above my roofline, while others migrate across continents. Amazing!

When I draw my circle and focus on “what changes can I make” I take back control of my life. And the funny thing is that although I can not make anyone change, when I change and begin to move forward in my life it creates a vacuum behind me that brings others along on the journey.

Today…what one change can I make in any given area that would make the most difference? Because My life changes when I do!

Popularity: 22% [?]

Call it a mid-life crises, an identity crises…who cares what you call it…what do you do about it?  You feel like your life is out of control! All you do is work, whether it is at your job or simply trying to keep up with the details of life. Sometimes you just want to escape, but you are too responsible to just bail.

Could there really be a healthy and safe way out?

You were in a terrible relationship. You worked up the nerve to leave, yet why do you still feel so bad?

You have the perfect family, a great job and to everyone looking in from the outside, it couldn’t be better. Why do you still feel something is missing?

Living a life of joy is really possible, and is not confined to perfect circumstances. Plenty of people have plenty of money yet money, an abundance of personal time, or even the perfect life partner doesn’t guarantee happiness.

Popularity: 20% [?]