Every so often I really am tempted to have someone just take care of the yard for me. (That does not mean that everyone reading this with a landscape business should call me.) Because, if someone else took care of it, I would miss out on all the important stuff I am supposed to learn through the experience of getting out there. For those who have received my newsletter in the past, you have read about butterflies, weeds, micro-climates and a host of other yard related topics. Well this week it’s about potato vine or kudzu. Let me explain what I mean.

Looks beautiful!

A number of years ago we built a new house on a wooded lot, a heavily wooded, previously un-cleared or ever mowed au-natural lot. This gave us a head start on that Florida landscape, that Sunken Gardens’ look that I love. It also gave us some interesting plants…like potato vine. If you are unsure what this is, think of driving on I-75 and those beautiful vines that fill the wooded sides of the road. That is what the back third of our lot looked like, with some beautiful native plants that we wanted to keep and some palmettos and palms…so we cleared this by hand.

This week working in my backyard, I realized that it is just like some of the other areas of my life. I may have been eating well, exercising, and taking my supplements or maybe I have been pursuing personal development by reading or maybe I have made a commitment to manage my finances more diligently and have been more careful in my spending. However, maintaining these habits is more than 21 days to a different life. 21 days is a start, but real lifelong development of behavior means periodically checking in to make sure that there are no little pieces of that old weedy behavior trying to rear its ugly head.

Looks can be deceiving...

I am still clearing by hand! Now it isn’t what it was. But I still have to be diligent, I still have to get out there and rescue the palmettos from this lovely, encroaching, invasive vine that would take over the world if there were not people like me. Although this vine has less of a hold on my yard year after year, like my life and the things that are important to me…auto pilot is not an option. Have you checked in lately to see how your garden is doing?

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In the last couple weeks we have had a “few cold” days in Florida. In some ways it was kind of nice to have a fire in the fireplace, and to be able to wear my leather jacket and the couple of warm sweaters that I own. However, despite the fact the people still looked fairly normal…strangely garbed shapes began to appear…some in florals and others in stripes and solids.

“Chickens”…”wimps” our northern friends think! Yet apprehension mounts as reports of near freezing temperatures circulate and our vegetation takes the covers…literally.

Several years ago I made a major change professionally. It wasn’t that I didn’t enjoy what I did, simply that there was something I wanted to do more. So I moved from my comfortable spot inside with more than adequate lighting and regular watering into the big outdoors. As I began to put out new roots without the confines of my former planter…it was scary. Used to a regular watering schedule and climate controlled comfort, a few of my leaves yellowed and dropped off.

Interesting that what fits in a lovely little pot on a windowsill in New York (like a pencil cactus) may grow 10 feet tall in my yard! In contrast to that, some gorgeous foliage (like hostas) won’t survive outside down here, regardless of the coaxing.

After about two years, I love where I am at in my life. I help people make changes. I help them see that there are more choices than they thought. I watch people and businesses grow and thrive and am thankful to be a part of their process. I look at my life and see the changes that I have made and can’t imagine going back. Am I done growing? Not even close in this climate.

**This post appeared several years ago in my Joy Beyond Freedom newsletter and I believe is even more relevant today! STAY TUNED for more “Climate and Growth News.”

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In the last couple weeks we have had a “few cold” days in Florida. In some ways it was kind of nice to have a fire in the fireplace, and to be able to wear my leather jacket and the couple of warm sweaters that I own. However, despite the fact the people still looked fairly normal…strangely garbed shapes began to appear…some in florals and others in stripes and solids.

“Chickens”…”wimps” our northern friends think! Yet apprehension mounts as reports of near freezing temperatures circulate and our vegetation takes the covers…literally.

Several years ago I made a major change professionally. It wasn’t that I didn’t enjoy what I did, simply that there was something I wanted to do more. So I moved from my comfortable spot inside with more than adequate lighting and regular watering into the big outdoors. As I began to put out new roots without the confines of my former planter…it was scary. Used to a regular watering schedule and climate controlled comfort, a few of my leaves yellowed and dropped off.

Interesting that what fits in a lovely little pot on a windowsill in New York (like a pencil cactus) may grow 10 feet tall in my yard! In contrast to that, some gorgeous foliage (like hostas) won’t survive outside down here, regardless of the coaxing.

After about two years, I love where I am at in my life. I help people make changes. I help them see that there are more choices than they thought. I watch people and businesses grow and thrive and am thankful to be a part of their process. I look at my life and see the changes that I have made and can’t imagine going back. Am I done growing? Not even close in this climate.

**This post appeared several years ago in my Joy Beyond Freedom newsletter and I believe is even more relevant today! STAY TUNED for more “Climate and Growth News.”

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Much of what is written about work life balance focuses on the element of time and how it is managed. For some I agree, time management is the place to start. However with many of the clients I work with, through many years of practice they have learned to manage their time. They have learned to incorporate many time saving devices and seem to fill most moments. However they still often feel overwhelmed and ineffective. They can honestly say there are just not enough hours in the day. Something has to change. They know that it’s got to be them, but are unsure of where to start.

Read the rest of this entry »

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Many parents may look forward to that day when their child, now an adult, moves out into the big world; this is a celebration of a job well done. However the pride of accomplishment is tinged with loss, sadness for the childhood that has gone by. The little arms that would wrap themselves around a neck as they said “I love you” are all grown up and off to start a family of their own.

 The better the change…the worse we tend to feel about any feelings that aren’t “all good.” In fact, often we just want to bypass or detour this part of the journey. However, a detour won’t take it off your map, because to fully embrace the future, the past must find its home.

 In going forward, there is always leaving behind. There is a part of you that is now only a memory, as the new you goes on. This “feeling” is completely normal, and although often uncomfortable, we all experience this “grieving” when dealing with significant change…even the good stuff.

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What resource do you have in common with the wealthiest person on the planet?

What quality do you share with the fastest runner in the world?

What gift do you possess that every successful artist requires?

…TIME…

At my High school reunion a wise friend said to me “20 years equalizes many things.”

Every day the clock strikes Midnight, and a new day begins.  Each person has the next 24 hours to call today, that won’t change.  The way we spend those hours and minutes is what separates us from each other.  No matter how we try, the day is the day. Time cannot be saved for tomorrow, it cannot be traded among friends, and once it is gone, it is gone! Ask yourself “At the end of the day, will I be frustrated with the way I spent my day, or will I be satisfied that it was a day well spent?”

Some people believe you only need to go faster to make “it” happen. They’re wrong.  Fractured families, stress induced disease, and mental breakdowns, are at the end of that road.  What can we do?

Take it one action step at a time. First identify priorities, and then focus your goals to reflect those priorities.  If this is done on a regular basis, when you ask yourself “was today a good day?” you will have a measuring stick.  Remember Bill Gates, Gandhi, and Mother Teresa, have accomplished great things, with the same 24 hours that you and I have.

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Time is the one thing that when it is gone, it is gone. No amount of wishing or praying will bring back yesterday. Each moment that goes by, is gone….into history. We each have a history, a series of moments that have passed, and we each have a future of moments to come…how many moments none of us know. We each exist in a time called the present; this is the NOW between what has gone by and what is to come.

I can’t live in the past or change one moment of it, and neither can I live in the future. Although intellectually that all makes sense, what I know in my brain may not be truth for my heart. Sometimes I am so busy scurrying towards the future I miss NOW. I miss the beauty of the Florida sun shining on Tampa Bay. So I am working and I don’t have the day off to go play in it, that doesn’t mean I cease to recognize its existence.

Or maybe the pain in my past has been so great that each day I wake with it right in front of me. The wounds still so fresh, that each person I talk to reminds me of my pain. Although time presents me with a tomorrow, I cannot see mine for the yesterday in which I live.

Great achievements come from men and women who understand living in Now. There may be pain in my past, but that is my history not my future. My future may be bright, but it is not NOW. My TIME is MY LIFE. This is it. I do not get a do over for this time around. This is not dress rehearsal. The curtain is up and the show continues whether I choose to run off the stage or not. So I will look at my history, my experience of yesterday to help me plan for tomorrow. But I will choose to be present…I will choose to live in today.

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Somewhere there is a part of us that knows this. Most of us have heard at some time or another, “No change equals No change.” Sometimes we don’t know what to do to change.

Other times we know exactly what to do, but for some reason are immobilized to make that change. Maybe we are overwhelmed by the sheer amount of changes we might need to make to successfully navigate whatever challenge we might be facing. Maybe we just don’t have the strength to make that giant leap. Maybe it really is “their” fault. Maybe the marketplace has changed.

As hard as I have tried to change others during the course of my lifetime, I have finally resigned myself to the fact that I CAN NOT make anyone else change. Admittedly it would be a whole lot easier if everyone else would just step into line. However, since that isn’t about to happen much of the change in my world has had to start with me. I have had to change the way I think of things. This last summer I spent some time contemplating the transformation of caterpillars.

To a caterpillar even pebbles look big. Yet some huge butterflies soar above my roofline, while others migrate across continents. Amazing!

When I draw my circle and focus on “what changes can I make” I take back control of my life. And the funny thing is that although I can not make anyone change, when I change and begin to move forward in my life it creates a vacuum behind me that brings others along on the journey.

Today…what one change can I make in any given area that would make the most difference? Because My life changes when I do!

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Joy…Beyond Freedom is really about the journey, specifically the journey that I have personally been on and how that relates to others. Freedom has many meanings as there are people to define it.

Many contemplate freedom as some incredible destination. But beyond freedom, what then? The journey is about enjoying the trip to freedom, about the changes we make along the way, and about “what then”. What happens when we get there and what comes next?

“It’s about change!”

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